Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house,
people were itching and it wasn't a louse.
The stockings were thrown in the laundry without care,
because the children knew I would have to clean them from there.
The children were bickering and whining too,
so instead of baking cookies, they got lots of cleaning to do,
While visions of solo vacations danced in my head,
the dog threw up, right next to my bed.
When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter; I banged my knee trying to see
what was the matter.
When, what to my wondering eyes did appear, the garbage tipped over and
made a huge smear.
Then in a twinkling, I heard a loud gurgle and flush,
and hoped with the plunger that I would have the magic touch.
Then I whistled and shouted and called them by name:
Now Isabella, now Anastasia, now Catherine too,
hurry up and go find your shoe.
On Francesca, on Victoria, my sweet little dears,
take a nap now while I stick cotton in my ears.
I spoke not a word, but went straight to my work,
tossing the presents into garbage bags
with a jerk.
And then I exclaimed as I examined my plight,
"Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night!"