Always and Sometimes

Hello! Nice to meet you. You might be wondering why I have kind of a crazed look in my eye.  I am a special needs mom. 

There's a few things I would like for you to know.

Sometimes, I get cranky. I am no hero. I get worn out with doctor's appointments, hospital stays, therapies, delays, and bonding issues, so please forgive me if I am not always perky. 

Always, I don't need to be reminded that I chose to adopt these kids. Sometimes, this is why I am afraid to share my feelings. 

 Sometimes, I might seem like I am not paying attention, but I just have alot on my mind. 

Sometimes, I dread going out in public, to see the looks of pity my kids get, and worse, when people just look away from them. 

Always, feel free to ask questions about my kids differences. I won't be offended. Not so long ago, I had no idea about the plight of special needs kids in other countries either. 

Sometimes, I don't know what to talk about when I meet new people. "Hey, sunny day, isn't it? My kid has to be in casts for six months and I am totally stressing out." just doesn't sound quite right. 

Sometimes, I worry if I am making the right decisions for my kids. Should they have more  physical therapy? Should I be researching more? I would love to talk about my concerns, but I don't want to burden anyone. 

Sometimes, I forget my kids have special needs, until I see other typical kids their age. Sometimes, I feel sad when I see other typical kids that are my children's ages. They can do so much more than my child and yes, I know, I know, my kids have made wonderful gains, but I still feel sad.  I wish my child could do what your child can. I wish my child had someone to love them and smile at them when they were tiny. 

Sometimes, people have differences you can see and differences you can't see. 

Always, please talk to your kids about people's differences so they don't laugh at my kids.  My kids may look different or act different, but that doesn't mean they don't understand.

Sometimes, my feelings get hurt more easily than they should.

Always, if you smile and tell me my children are beautiful, it will absolutely make my day! 

Sometimes, I want my kids to perform for you, so I can show everyone they are not dumb. I want people to see how amazing they really are. 

 

Sometimes, it's too exhausting and stressful to go out. 

Sometimes, my kids might act embarrassing. Sometimes, I dread going to social events. 

Sometimes, when my kids get overwhelmed in new situations, they shriek.  They make funny noises. They just stare into space. Sometimes, I don't know what to do when they act like this. 

Sometimes, people think my child is just being a brat.

Always, I don't want advice on how to stop them from being a brat. Please give them a chance and see beyond their behavior. 

            

Sometimes, I need someone to push me to get out and have some fun! 

My friend, Erin, who adopted two special needs children internationally, explains how parents of special needs kids can feel isolated.

                                                     Some more thoughts here too.

Sometimes, I think we really all have some kind of special need, so let's just all be kind to each other. 

Always, always, I am proud of my kids and so glad to be their mom! My kids are rock stars, just like yours!