"What lies behind us, and what lies before us are small matters
compared to what lies within us."
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Thursday, August 11, 2011

Put a Zipper on It

Ever since Victoria's NG tube fell out the other day, I have been dreading shoving it back in. I became even more nervous when I realized I did not have the highly coveted gell needed to make the tube slide easily down her little baby throat. When I called the doctor they told me I could use any water soluable based product.

"Is there anything specific I should use?" I asked.
"KY lubricant works really well" the nurse told me.

Well, ok then, whatever works.

So, I took Anastasia with me to the CVS and asked where the KY lubricant was. The guy looked at me kind of strangely.
"Oh, it's not for me", I blurted out, "it's for my daughter."
His eyes widened.
"No, not for this daughter. She's eight already. I need it for my two year old." I bumbled on.
The pharmacist picked up the phone, even though it hadn't rung, and looked quickly away from me.
Finally I realized that I really needed to stuff the entire bottle of KY jelly in my mouth to keep myself from saying anymore.

Later on, Catherine apparently thought the lubricant was lip gloss, but that's a whole other story.

Have any of you ever put your foot in your mouth?


  1. I busted out laughing at this post. Lots of your post make me laugh, you have such a gracious sense of ease among all the little ones at your feet.

  2. Oh absolutely but, I couldn't top that one!! PRICELESS!!!

  3. Similar experience w/ the ky b/c that's what they use to help hearing aids slide in. And yep, all the kids want to try it. Never dull, is it? LOL.

  4. Haha! Well I did learn not to tell my husband to "google it" after he asked me for the address for Dicks Sporting Goods ;)


  5. Liked the part when you said no it's not for me it's for my daughter. Oh not her my two year old. That made me laugh. Perhaps you should write a book. Praying for you and your sweet family!

  6. Ha! I can't stop laughing to think!!!!

  7. Oh boy, laughing here! I had to get some "jelly" and suppositories for my son. I wasn't even thinking till the teenager who rung up my purchases told me to "have a good night". I wanted to explain, but as my face turned a deep shade of crimson I figured it was better to not say anything....

  8. All the time! My husband says I need a chaperone at parties and I'm not even allowed at his work parties. I have to say you take the cake for "foot in the mouth while shopping"! Just think of how much excitement you're bringing to some bored employee's day and the great story you gave him for later that night.

  9. LOL! Well I've used breastfeeding cream on my lips before; very hydrating!

    I put my foot in my mouth ALL THE TIME. My husband should write a book becuase there's enough to fill one!

  10. Hahahah. Yes, I do that all the time. I am constantly saying things and then going.. oh. wait. that sounds bad. but it's not. i promise!

    I'm so awkward sometimes. I think my mouth is ahead of my brain.


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